Nothing serious, just observations I’ve written down. This may be the lifelong height of my game and I have no fear of interacting with anyone in any environment. There is no doubt or anxiety in my mind at all and I see things I normally don’t see, because my eyes are always open. All men seem nervous and unsure of themselves. Women do too, but they are allowed to be. Black people are increasingly nice to me and I am at times more comfortable with them than members of my own race.
— When I go on auto-pilot, I start every conversation with a question. At the bar, I lean forward slowly, lock eye contact with a slight smile, pause briefly, and ask the bartender, “What should I drink?” At a rock and roll party, the DJ was dressed as Ziggy Stardust. EC, smile, slight pause. “Are you Ziggy Stardust?” “I am.” “Are you familiar…with Livin’ on a Prayer?” “Yes I am,” with a smile. “How bad do you want to hear that right now?” “So bad,” laughing. At a show, lean over and ask “Oh, what record did you get?” Girl immediately opens body language, makes eye contact, answers emphatically.
You were probably raised with TV, or worse, the Internet. No more than 3 hundredths of a second separate you from whatever information or stimulation you want. Your brain moves at 100 mph because its been taught to. It can move as quickly as it wants, and expect results immediately.
Real life does not occur at these speeds, and in a world where status is determined by immersion in the social world, the high status man paces reality at its own speed – not the speed inside his head. The highest status man sees the furthest into the future. He sees where he will be in 30 seconds, 30 minutes, 30 days. It means nothing when a girl throws a shit test and fucks up the next 2 seconds of the conversation – if you already know where you’re taking it afterwards.
— The highest status man has the greatest level of awareness of the world around him. Watch your self. Watch your field of vision. What does it do when you are the lowest end of the totem pole? What does it do when you are the one guy who knows nobody there? You get tunnel vision. When you know everyone, and everyone loves you, your eyes are wide and you see all the moving parts before you. This is how women see the world at all times, because their response to status challenges is one of engagement rather than avoidance. They are more in sync with the people around them, so they confront and engage rather than hiding in a corner where the kings can’t see them.
When you are at that level of status, you may see one cute girl and hone in on her like a target. Your eyes may follow her around the room. When you talk to others, you will glance over at her unconsciously. She knows this is happening and it creeps her the hell out. Don’t get tunnel vision. Don’t focus on one girl.
Territory is more than physical space. If you are the highest status, the world is your territory. Not only can you walk where you want, you can occupy people’s ears by talking when you want to. You can occupy their attention by engaging whoever you want to. You can look wherever you want to.
The last part is important for two reasons. One, I keep noticing that self-doubt can be neutralized by shifting attention outside of yourself. By immersing yourself in the social world around you. And keeping your attention on multiple people, pacing reality as it occurs, firmly plants you in the real world.
Two, because there is a physiological reason for it. Your eyes use different parts for “zooming” versus “wide angle” shots. They are called rods and cones, and they interact very differently with your brain. One is used for reading or hunting and it engages your “left” brain. One is used for laying back and taking in information all at once — not linearly, not sequentially. This engages your “right” brain, and this is the mode you must be in when you socialize. Social power is not about hunting. It is about gathering, and before you can succeed, you must learn to operate differently. You must learn to engage the world all at once.
Texts from the past 48 hours so you know I’m not full of shit: